I Am Not

If I wake up and look in the mirror I am not the reflection you see. When I walk down the street and you see the way I walk, I am not the way you want me to walk. When you address me and hear me talk, I am not the way you hear me talk. When I give my opinion I am not subject to your opinion. I am the reflection I see in the mirror, I am proud when you see me walk, I communicate well when you hear me talk, and I am my opinion. When I look in the mirror I see a beautiful long lady because of what I believe in, the things I do for others as well as myself, and the ora in which I carry myself. When I walk down the street I walk with pride because I know that God is walking with me and nothing or anyone can harm. When you address me I speak with knowing. I tell what I know and believe and the things I have experienced. When I give my opinion it is not to impress you because I don't want to be like anyone else. I am not you or what you want me to be, yet I am me.

The Lord

Good morning! I went to sleep last night thinking what my life should be. I kept trying to think what God wants me to do with my life. Is he leading me in direction of his choice or am I straying away and not following his instructions. I know that the good and bad paths are given to you, but it is your choice to choose which one to follow. I prayed last night for understanding and strength. I would love to know all the plans that God has layed out for me. I know that I probably will never know all at once, but one day when it happens I'll know it is what God wants. There are so many things in this world that turn you away from God. People have to remember that they are in this world but not of this world. Believe me, there is a better place then this world. God has made a place for us to go forever and forever if we just confess with our months that Jesus is Lord and believe in our hearts that Christ died for our sins. I would encourage all to find the Lord Jesus Christ for themselves. He will turn their world upside down. Now do not get me wrong, there will be trials and tribulations that one must go through, so do not think it is the easiest thing to do. Being a christian takes dedication and commitment. You have to strenghten yourself in your walk with Christ by reading the word of God and trusting in him. You can go to God with all your problems and no matter how big or small he is there to listen to you. If your friends will not listen, trust that God will. He is all knowing, and always present. I would love to share the word of God with all. It is amazing what he can do for you and the things you can accomplish with him watching over you. You will not have to fight any battles because he fights for you. I love the Lord and would not be here today if it was not for him.

The Classroom Position

4- In classrooms, you are asked to assume positions that are not just intellectual but also pyshical and spatial, even discursive (in the sense that the classrooms position when and how you speak and write). How do classrooms position you? How would you like to position yourself?

In the classroom one can take on many different roles as a student. You can be passive rarely participate in classroom discussions. You can be active and have an opinion about everything said. You can be goofy and not really pay attention. There are many more roles of a student in a classroom than I am stating. A teacher expects a student to be flexible and able to look at situations from a lot of point-of-views. When I am in the classrooms I feel as if they position me as if I already know what they feel I should have been taught. The classrooms are very diverse so some students have knowlegde of certain things, whereas other student were not expose to that certain information. Some classrooms position me as if I am the student and I cannot know any of what they know. I guess everything actually depends on the teacher of the classroom. I would like to position myself in classrooms to be given all the information the teachers believes will be valuable in my education process. I want to put myself into a recieving position where I am open to everything; but I can distinguish what is right and wrong or what information will benefit me.

Special Person

Well, I am so excited because sweetest day is coming up on the 20th of this month. That is only a few days away. For a special someone, what would you get? Now, does it depend on who this person is to you? Does it depend on how much you like this person? Someone help me! I don't know. My sweetie is coming up here and I'm happy. I guess it will be great to him after so long of not seeing him at all. Its been excatly two months since I've seen him last. When I think about this I get really happy because..........well, you all know how it feels when your going to see someone special to you. He is coming all the way from Florida and I cannot wait. We enjoy being around each other and spending time with each other. We make each happy. I guess this is the type of person everyone she have in their lives. So, everyone make sure you let that special person know you care.

What She has Shown me

14- Describe the man who had the greatest influence on how you regard men or the woman who had the greatest influence on how you regard women. What personal attributes attracted you to that person? Have you met anyone or had any experiences that have led you to question your original beliefs about men and women?

A great women. One who has worked hard with the help of God all her life. No depending on others, knowing that everything in life is worth working for. She knows that hard work will pay off. She is one who gives chances, takes care of those who aren't her own. One who pays attention and gives good advice. I say she is a valuable asset to life and has had a positive influence on all those who have come in contact with her. She gives off a positive vibe and makes people want to trust and confide in her. The great women is indeed my great aunt Donna Ray. She has been there for me all of my life and supported me even when my mother couldn't. She is just like a parent to me and I respect and take into consideration everything she tells me. I thank God for her all the time because she is truly a blessing to my life as well as many others I know. Because of her I regard women as hardworking and determined. Women go through so much just because they are women and she has shown me that you will be alright as long as you persevere. I look at a women as a strong being, one who indures all, yet it strong enough to over come. The personal attributes that attracted me to her is her strenght and loving and kindness. Those that go through many obstacles in life look for comfort in those who have been through the same things and know where you are coming from. I was able to look at her and recognize how a growing women should live life. She showed me who to put my trust in and who will never foresake me. So far in life I have not had any experiences that questioned my original belief of women. I hope that my beliefs on women does not change because I am pretty fine with what I believe now. I look forward to living my life in the shadow of those that are great role models to me but to also become one who is looked upon one day as a good influence.

Choices

Everyone has certain situations and predicaments that they are put in. The only thing you can do is pray that you are making the best decisions for your life. I know that a huge situation in my life right now is that my boyfriends is away at college as well but is all the way in Florida. I can tell you from the experiences that I have had so far with us being so far apart. The need and want to someone is great and can have a negative effect on you. It is definitely hard to go without seeing that person for such long periods of time. Another thing is that since you can't see them whenever you want to you depend on talking. Being at school, you do not have that much extra time where you can just be on the phone all the time for leisure. You have to have trust and faith in the person where you know that your relationship is stable enough to endure the many pressure of being long distance. Speaking of pressure, yes there are many. Just having so much freedom and options available to makes the choosing part so difficult. I have come to realize that life without choices is not a life worth living. Choice is one of the best things that life offers. Some say people are fools for not taking certain opportunities and making certain choices. Right here is another problem. No one can choose the path you go down except for yourself because when you look back on your life and you didn't follow your right mind when choices were giving you probably won't be where you seen yourself at when you were younger. Now I understand myself that the choices I make will effects those who I care about the most. Seeing as I wrote this, I should know what all of this means and should be able to make the correct choices for myself as life goes on. Choices, the choices I make from here on out will be beneficial to myself and those I care about.

The Weekend

Well, when Friday came I thanked God. He is the only one who knows what I go through. I was looking forward to this weekend being good. It was Father's Weekend. You know how that goes. They say their coming, but don't actually show up. I'll get over it because hey, I'm use to it. Any who, I decided to catch up on some sleep if you know what I mean. Days and days straight working, homework, class, and etc..... Everyone needs that extra time to close their eyes. So, on Friday after class I decided to take a long nap. So I sleep for about two and a half hours. It felt so good that I didn't want to get up. But, when my friend called me to go to dinner I said yes. We ate and then went back to her room. We wanted to watch a movie and because we are both big Disney Channel fans we watched Aladdin. While we were watching that I was curling her hair. The basic old girl stuff. Then her friend, this boy, came over and stayed on the phone all while I was curling her hair. I just decided that he must have been talking to a girlfriend or something because he had a low voice, you know, the late night voice. Anyway, when I finished her hair he got off the phone and we were of course asking who was on the phone. He said it was his mom and he showed us the call. I don't believe that, it was a trick. After that we went to late nights to get some snacks and then went to our friends dorm. Now we had on our pajamas and really weren't planning to go anywhere. They told us about a party that they were about to go to so we were up for it. Even though we didn't end up going, we all chilled, laughed and had a good time I guess. I didn't go to sleep until around four or five o'clock. Figures I spend all of Saturday sleeping. Literally sleeping. I couldn't pull myself out of bed. When I got up I basically stayed in my room and watched some movies. I did some studying and homework. I got a lot done I would say. And today is Sunday. This only call for more studying and more homework. So I guess it's time to say goodbye and time for me to get back to work.

Males vs. Females

11- Humans have a long history of pointing out differences in the way females and males use language. We often talk about female and male ways of carrying on a conversation or about differences in the books and movies that tend to attract significantly more of one gender or the other.

Are males and females equal. Some men believe that they are superior to women and the things they say have more concrete value that what women say. On the other hand, some women believe that they are equal to men in basically every way. Men tend to carry their conversations with the sense that what they say goes and no one can challenge it. Women are more relaxed in conversations and know that everything they say may not be right. Even though both males and females like to be right, women except the fact better than men. Another thing is books and movies. When coming from a males point-of-view, the rougher side of the story comes out. Man tell more about the violence and crimes. Men feel that the audience would like to know more about the gritty side. When coming from a womens point-of-view, the softer and more gentle side of the story comes out. Women like to tell about the sensitive things and how everything got started. You can say that men attracts the sex who is more into action which are usually the males. While women attract more of the sex that like romance which are usually the females. Males and females definitely have different views but I believe that they are still both equal.

Good Morning

Good morning, today should be a wonderful day. Yeah, that sounds like something a councilor would say. I woke up with a stuffy nose and hopefully it will clear up as the day goes on. I don't know what to really write about except that like to write. It may not be what you would like to read but hey, I'm able to express some feelings. One reason I like to write is that it's relaxing. Whenever I'm extremely upset I write about it. This gets me to thinking about whether what's making me upset is actually that serious. Most of the times I realize that I don't have a reason to be that disturbed. Anyway, writing is a great thing because it shows your creativity and how your thought process works. For those of you that like to write you are definitely not alone. Well, there is more to be done than just writing even though I love it. The day must go on.

Hard Enough

I stayed up late last night writing and correcting this essay. Man, my eyes were low, head was hurting, knuckles cracking, and stomach rumbling. I had to do it; there was no other choice. You have to put in the effort if you want your hard work to show through the things you do. When I awoke this morning I realized that the day had just began and there was a whole list of tasks to be done. Yeah, it is hard, but I can work through it. Give it time, thats what some may say. But only time reveals whats more to come. Hard! Yeah, but I know it will make me better. Struggle now and succeed later. So, no it is not hard enough. Theres more to come and indeed it will be harder. So I keep trying to encourage myself to stay on track and prepare myself for when it gets harder.

Personal or Not!

Personal. What exactly is personal? Who defines personal? How long can it stay personal?

My business, my thoughts, my ideas, my life is what I consider to be personal. Only few people ever enter into your personal world. Sometimes you feel like everything you do affects you so therefore it shouldn't be spread around like rumors or a bad disease. Personal things can become self conscience without you realizing it. Why do people spend their whole lives concealing things that are of no importance to others. Once you have realized that, then there will be fewer things keep as personal. Now, no one can tell you and define what's personal to you. You are an individual and what's your makes you different than any other person. If you don't want anyone getting to your personals you put up a barrier. Whether people want to realize it or not, as time goes on the barrier gets weaker and weaker because it cannot hold back so many things. Some tend to hide themselves and never show their true feelings, which is highly classified as personal. Feelings belong to you and you are in control of what happens to them. You can express them. But what actually happens when this is done? Nothing! People now know what, when, why, and where certain things took place. People stare and can just be cruel. While, on the other hand, you can conceal these feelings and no one will ever know. There will be no stares and other people will have no idea your feelings. Though there are some who live there lives just to get inside of others heads and find out all there juicy personal stuff. Though I think these people need help, they are indeed out there. So, by deciding not to let anyone in on your small, medium and large personals you believe that it will be kept to your forever. Wrong. Yes, the barrier will get weak and "what happens in the dark will come to the light." People can only keep stuff in for so long. The natural corse shall take place and those things that were kept personal soon, very soon will be known to all. Now, it doesn't really matter, but seeing as it's not my feelings then maybe it does matter. By all means, keep your life personal but just await the day when all will be known. Personal or Not!

Good Morning!!

Hi, are you always busy? Does your life consists of many different parts that no one knows about? Can you ever just live a normal life? What is a normal life? Have you ever had a long weekend?

Well, working all day and working all night. My life definitely consists of many different parts. No matter how small and no matter how big each takes up a valuable piece of time. Staying up late to write a paper and putting in just a few extra hours to guarantee that you did your best. Yawning and stretching your arms knowing you would usually be sleep. I been told many time that college is not a place for sleep instead constant working. Read this, write this, analyze that, and prepare for this. It seems like they never stop throwing stuff at you. I know you all have experienced the morning when you wake up feeling accomplished because the night before you stayed up to God knows when finishing work. Even though your extremely tried, you are motivated to continue the day with a feeling of joy because you know that behind all the tiredness, you have gotten one small thing out of the way. And just when you think you can relax something else is surely thrown your way. You see, a good morning cannot exist if one doesn't have anything to worry about about the night before. So if are one of those people who stayed up late to get a small or big something done, have a good morning!!

1- Recall the experience of being an outsider joining a new group. What was unfamiliar in the language - and behavior - of that group? How did your own attitudes and behaviors begin to change as you grew to be accepted within that new community? How was the change captured in your language?



Always on the move and you never seem to be in one place long enough to make good friends. Since I use to move around a lot when I was in grammar school I could never quite grasped that best friends thing. I know packing up everything and started a new life somewhere else sounds difficult but only those who go through will ever know. One experience of me being an outsider was when I had to start a new school. The first time is always scary because all the students stare at you as if your wierd and just don't fit in.